The Shit They Don’t Tell You: 12 Things New Parents Need to Know

This article is written by NF Rebel Correspondent, Dan.

New parent? Thinking of having kids? Thinking of not having kids?

Today we’re going to bring you some hard truths.

I‘ve just had my third child because I am a crazy person I love being a dad so much, and there are still things that happen each day where I think ‘huh, never knew that.’ Even though I’ve been a parent educator for years, I still get shocked about how little I know.

I’ve spoken to hundreds of expectant mothers and fathers in ante-natal classes, giving them the general rundown on pregnancy, birthing, raising kids, child development and parenting. Today you are getting the real scoop: the stuff I don’t even cover there.

The decision to go for completion of the “parenting quest” is not to be made lightly. We’re going to arm you with the knowledge of traps, bosses, and challenges that lie ahead.

Being prepared is key, so let’s stock our inventory with some rarely passed on knowledge.

Shit they don’t tell you: Pregnancy

“It’s not that uncomfortable.”

“It’s the best time of your life.”

“You’ll be ‘glowing’.”

Wrong, wrong, and wrong.

Here’s what to really expect when you’re expecting:

1. It can be hard to even get pregnant:

We were told all through high school, if you have unprotected sex, you will definitely get pregnant (and die). Sure, it can (and in my public high school, often did) happen, but it can take months, even years, for a perfectly healthy, young couple to conceive.

At the age of 30, out of 100 couples trying to conceive naturally, only 20 will conceive within one month and around 85 will conceive within one year.

Many couples spend years doing everything they can to not get pregnant, only to then spend years trying to get pregnant. It can be a super tough time on the couple, who are often suffering in silence.

2. It can be hard to stay pregnant:

Sometimes nature is a complete asshole. You’ve spent months (or years) trying to fall pregnant and it’s finally happened. You’re so excited, you start planning names, telling family the good news, imagining the life ahead, when all of a sudden… sorry, back to the start of the first mission.

Speaking from experience, it’s so hard to even describe how devastating this is.

Nobody really talks about it, but miscarriage is  very common, even if you’re in those ‘prime baby makin’ years’. To reduce your risk, maintaining a healthy lifestyle, weight and diet is the most important thing you can do (there’s a great website that can help you with all of that). If you’re having recurrent miscarriages, go see a medical professional.

Just on these first two points (which are super depressing, sorry about that), please be aware that your friends may be trying to have children with no luck, so please try and avoid the classic “Why haven’t you guys had kids yet?” question at social gatherings. We know you mean no harm by it, but it can make the couple feel a little awkward.

3. Pregnancy is long and messy:

Not surprisingly, making a human inside of another human takes a huge toll on the body. Things start moving, not working, squirting, ‘in’ things start to become ‘out things,’ and everything hurts.

Nearing the end of my wife’s first pregnancy (she gets ‘super pregnant’) she said to me “If anyone looked at my Google search history over the past 8 months, they would think I was the most disgusting human ever.”

By the end, most women can’t wait for it to be over. Be prepared to be uncomfortable, sick, and cranky. Partners, be prepared to be more supportive (and thick skinned) than you’ve ever been before.

4. The birthing process is also long and really messy:

Don’t expect it to be like the movies. Every birth and labor is different, but the whole process can take anywhere up to and over 24 hours. It can be messy, bloody, and extremely draining (both physically and emotionally) for all involved.

The good news is, a lot of that is quickly forgotten once baby arrives (who will also be messy and gross looking). Think of this like hitting your first checkpoint/save point along the quest.

You’ll be glad for the breather.

Shit they don’t tell you: Newborns

“They’re so beautiful.”

“The hard part is over now.”

“She looks just like you.”

Wrong, wrong, and I sure hope not.

5. Newborns and infants are just messy:

As mentioned above, they’re not the prettiest things when they first come out. People like to pretend they are, but they’re definitely not.

Depending on the birth, a newborn can be very bruised, have a misshaped head, and be covered in a gooey substance. This is all very normal, and they start to look (almost) human shortly.

But it doesn’t end there. New parents are often shocked at how messy babies are. Babies may be small, but they can poop and puke like nobody’s business. Your stomach gains superpowers in the first few months. What you would “never” be able to handle before all just becomes part of the routine.

Also, nobody told me that some newborn girls get vaginal bleeding shortly after birth, and nothing will scare you more than opening a diaper and seeing blood on the inside. If this happens to you, don’t worry, I’ve checked, it’s totally normal.

6. Everyone’s an expert, you’re a n00b:

Consider yourself warned: On every topic, be it feeding, sleeping, wrapping, carrying, playing, whatever… everyone else, even those without kids, is an expert and you don’t know shit about your child or parenting.

Even when you try to educate yourself a little bit, you’ll will find contradicting evidence for both sides of the argument, no matter what topic you’re looking into.

My advice (for what it’s worth): try a few things and figure out what best works for your family. As long as you’re not doing your child or yourself any harm, this is usually the best way to go. Don’t always trust the ‘experts’ (this definitely DOES include me). I’ve worked with so many high ranking child and parenting specialists who I would not trust my kids with for a second.

Nobody knows your child better than yourself.

7. You may not love your child straight away, and that’s totally OK:

A lot of parents will talk about an instant and extreme bond with their newborn, and yes, this happens for a lot of parents. But for many others, there is a ‘breaking in’ period, where you’re not so sure about the little screaming alien looking thing, and you surely can’t be expected to love it, right?

You know you are supposed to love them, because it’s the ‘right’ thing to do as a parent. But deep down you know you don’t. Does this make you a horrible person? Of course not.

Think of having a newborn as the tutorial level (side note: I hate tutorial levels, Driver on the PS1 scarred me for life). It’s all new and different, and it’s probably not showcasing the features that will make it your new favorite game. It takes the time and experience, struggling and fumbling your way through things for a lot of parents to start enjoying it all – and that’s ok!

Similarly, even as they grow, there will be times where you actually dislike your children (they can be really mean) and you will feel really guilty because of this. This too is ok, and believe me, you are definitely not alone.

8. You will worry, A LOT:

Yes yes, you think “obviously I’ll worry.”

No, you don’t understand. I’m telling you there’s a boss behind the door that you don’t know about. His name? The Worry. [Cue the dramatic music.]

The Worry is possibly the hardest and least relenting battle on the quest. The Worry got me in my early quest days, and still continues to reappear along the way.

“What if she dies?” “What if I die?” “What if my partner dies?” “I don’t make enough money and never will.” “What if they’ve got (insert any disease here)?” “What if they’re Trekkies even though I’ve raised them on Star Wars?” “Team Valor is clearly superior, but what if they choose Team Mystic when they grow up?”

All important questions, which will cause worry in any parents mind.

I’ve yet learnt how to fully slay The Worry beast, but I’ve become better at managing it. As many do with time and practice. But fact is, you will always worry, so try your best to accept and get used to it.

You will think they’re dying at least a dozen times in their first year (kids get sick all the time) and even as they grow, they’re always preoccupying your mind. They become your top priority, always.

The Other Shit They Don’t Tell You

“It’s not really that much of a change.”

“You’ll still do all the things you used to.”

“It gets easier over time.”

Wrong, wrong, and… kinda wrong.

9. Your relationship will change, A LOT:

Lifestyle changes naturally occur with having a children. A loss of freedom and loss of time together as a couple are challenges for all parents and can be overwhelming at times.

You’re both much more tired, worried, and overwhelmed than you’ve ever been before. You realize how much better sleep is than sex, and you’re no longer each other’s top priority. Children can put a strain on any relationship, no matter how strong it is.

You’ll both start disagreeing more (please remember that with parenting there is often more than one correct way to do something), and traps will start arising in the most unlikely of places (jealous your partner gets goes to work where they can ‘rest’, while you have to stay at home doing a much harder job).

But if you’re lucky enough to have someone pick up the weird third party controller and make the quest multiplayer, your battles are going to be much easier. However, your communication and teamwork will always have to be top notch.

10. It’s totally optional:

Obvious, right? I thought so too, until I started speaking at pre-conception groups for young couples.

You don’t have to have kids because ‘it’s the right thing to do’ or you’re ‘getting to that age’ or ‘our parents want grandkids’. If you don’t want kids (I must say after the week I’ve had, totally not a bad choice, by the way), don’t have them.

Sure, those without kids may think every now and then ‘gee, I wonder what my life would have been like with kids?’, but I guarantee you every parent thinks multiple times a week ‘gee, imagine what my life would have been like without kids.’

Don’t feel it’s something you need to do to simply ‘tick off the list’. It takes a lot of hard work, time, sleepless nights, and money. It’s ok to not have kids and be happy with your life. If you know it’s not for you, don’t kid yourself. This quest is optional, and not devoting an enormous part of your adult life to a single quest won’t stop you from leveling up your life. If it’s the right choice, it may even help.

11. You will change, A LOT:

Your sleep habits are forced to change, your lifestyle is forced to change, your finances are forced to change, and you as a person will change too.

Expect to become different. Boring, safe, sensible, tired, soft and lame…and what’s even worse is, you’ll love it. You will become way more empathetic (I got a little choked up this week by, of all things, a freaking golf store commercial!) because you’ve now got a whole new perspective on life.

Things you used to be so passionate about will take a back seat. Jerry Seinfeld put it very well when he said “Once a man has children, for the rest of his life, his attitude is, “To hell with the world, I can make my own people.”

To hell with the world indeed; my whole world is under one roof. Sure, I still view myself as a gamer, punk rocker, good husband, weekend golf pro and outright geek, but above all, I’m a dad, and will be for the rest of my days.

12. You won’t be as great of a parent as you thought you’d be:

Yep, sorry, that does even mean you rebels who are actually taking time to read parenting articles and advice.

We all start off with grand ambitions of being #1, or ‘World’s Greatest Parent‘, but when reality kicks in, a lot of days we’ll settle for ‘World’s okay-est parent.’

You’re going to mess up, you’re going to take a while to get things right, and you’re certainly going to be that parent in the store one day. I’ve yet to meet a parent who’s got it all together, all the time. Even us ‘experts’ are just making it up as we go along.

As bad as I just made it sound, it’s totally worth it.

So, have I turned all you nerdy parents to be off of having children yet? I sure hope not, we need to be building a better, nerdier next generation. I don’t want the world to become (more) like ‘Idiocracy’.

In the scheme of things, the reason nobody tells you this shit is because…a lot of it doesn’t really matter.

The smile on your baby’s face when they first recognize you. The laughter and pure joy they get from rolling around on the floor with you. The wonder in their eyes as you do stupid dad magic. You being their first word. Creating and shaping a human life. THAT is the shit that really matters.

Yes, choosing to take on the parenting quest instantly increases the difficulty, but in terms of the XP and treasure you’ll gain, it’s so worth it.

You’ll rise to challenges you never thought you could defeat, you’ll battle the bosses of teething, feeding, tiredness and the dreaded Worry. You’ll constantly be switching between hero and villain, and even though you may lose a bit of your loot along the way, you’ll have the best damn sidekick to share, and conquer, the lifelong game with.

It’s messy, terrifying, and really bloody tough. It’s not for everyone, but those of us currently on the quest won’t be hitting the reset button any time soon.

You have the most important job in the world, you’re the boss of leveling up the future, leaving a legacy on this planet, and laying big plans for a better tomorrow. If you’re up to the challenge, rise to it, for them, for you, and for the future of the Rebellion.

Future parents, what else do you want to know?

Noob parents, what other shit weren’t you told about?

Leet parents, what wisdom can you bestow upon us?

Non parents, what does a hot meal taste like?

Let us know in the comments,

– Dan

source https://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2016/07/25/the-shit-they-dont-tell-you-12-things-new-parents-need-to-know/

What is Limu Juice?

Everywhere  you look, some new “health company” is spending big on advertising in an attempt to cash in on the world’s most profitable industry.

It might be an exercise program, dieting plan, or a miracle supplement.  It’s almost as if the industry wants us to believe the nutritional community is making a groundbreaking discovery every month or two. All too often, these are the same diet trends and programs that are being rebranded in more up-to-date packages.

Worse yet, some of these trendy new diets have no basis in science and can be potentially harmful.  Afterall, most of these products are sold as “revolutionary”.

So if you’re wondering if Limu juice is another one of these, I don’t blame you.

However, I’m here to tell you that Limu juice and limu moui are NOT some new dieting trend.

Introducing Limu Moui

In fact, Limu has been a staple in the diets of Polynesian natives throughout the islands for hundreds of years.

To these peoples, the word limu has several related meanings, spanning from moss and lichen to seaweed and algae.  Various polynesian groups have incorporated limu into their diets generation after generation, providing them with a rich profile of nutrients.

Specifically, Tongan Limu Moui is a type of brown seaweed that is found around the shores of the Tonga Islands.  It is extremely nutritious and is used as a dietary supplement with various benefits.

What is Limu Juice?

To put things simply:

Limu Moui is a superfood with a ton of nutritional benefits.  Limu Juice is a fruit drink containing limu moui extract.

Today, you can find limu supplements, limu facial creams, and other limu-based products.  Not surprisingly, the undisputed leader in the limu product industry is called The Limu Company.  Their Limu Original Juice is easily the most recognizable limu superfood product in the world today.

As more and more people rave about Limu Original Juice, Limu Energy (BluFrog), Limu Lean, the interest in this company grows.  Many testimonials talk about how the products have changed their lives.  (This buzz is what likely led you to reading this post today.)

Still, there are concrete questions that still need to be answered.

What is Limu Juice Made Of?

Limu Juice is not simply pressed seaweed; it’s much more than that.

It contains a compound of particular interest called fucoidan.

The fucoidan is concentrated using The Limu Company’s proprietary extraction process.  It has been shown to provide some amazing benefits when consumed on a regular basis.  It is what separates limu from regular seaweed and comparable plants and algae.

The Limu Company blends this fucoidan extract with real mango, apple, pear, and papaya to provide an extra pop of antioxidants as well as a great taste.

What Does Limu Juice Do?  

Fucoidan is a compound that is found exclusively in brown seaweed and brown algae, in species such as kombu, wakame, mozuku, hijiki, and bladderwrack, to name a few. It is classified as a sulfated polysaccharide which provides a number of benefits for the body.

Limu and other marine vegetables containing sulfated polysaccharides have been used in herbal Chinese medicine for thousands of years.  But over the last ten, increased scholarly interest has resulted in several different studies revealing promising benefits.

Effects of Sulfated Polysaccharides

Sulfated Polysaccharides have been shown to possess beneficial properties including:

• Anticoagulant (reduces blood clotting)
• Antiviral (kills viruses)
• Antioxidant (inhibits oxidation and removes free radicals in the body)
• Antiprotozoal (kills protozoa in the body or inhibits their growth)
• Antiinflammatory (reduces inflammation, one of the true causes of all disease)
• Antibacterial (kills bacteria)
• Antitumor (preventing the formation and growth of tumors)
• Antilipemic (prevents the accumulation of fatty substances in the blood)
• Immunomodulatory

The Benefits of Limu and Limu Juice

Although the research has been very promising, it’s unlikely the FDA would ever allow limu supplement companies to make medical claims.

The FDA draws a real line between nutritional products and medical products, so the The Limu Company’s hands are somewhat tied when it comes to what benefits they can claim.  Although the major benefits of fucoidan are well-known in the medical community, there is only so much nutrition-focused companies can say about their products.

Some of the claims that can be made about Limu Juice are:

• Supports your immune system
• Improved joint mobility
• Increased energy
• More restful sleep
• Softer, smoother skin
• Greater sense of health & wellness
• Promotes healthy blood cholesterol
• Allergy relief

You’ll notice a major difference between what the studies say and what limu supplement companies are allowed to say about their products.  As great as “increased sleep” is, “antitumor” is a lot more compelling.

Good thing we know the FDA always has our back! (Not!)

My Experience with Limu Juice

I have joined the thousands of people that are experiencing the benefits that Limu Juice is able to provide. After drinking Limu Juice regularly for the past few months, I can tell you first hand that the claims that you read online about this drink are real.

I have never felt better before in my life. After the first month of trying it, I lost 4 pounds, my pants are too big for me, and I have more energy now than ever before. If you are looking for a diet that actually works, I could not recommend Limu Juice highly enough.

The post What is Limu Juice? appeared first on Limu Juice.

from Limu Juice http://www.limujuice.net/limu/what-is-limu-juice/

source http://limujuice.tumblr.com/post/147784402108

Simple and Delicious: How to Cook Fajitas

What’s up all you party people! It’s that time of the month. (No, not that time of the month). It’s time to learn how to cook something new.

This time we’re going back to basics with our recipes with an easy peasy, Level One fajita recipe. With less than 10 ingredients, you’ll be done in 30 minutes. If you’re feelin’ hungry, and want to try something new and simple for dinner, you’ve come to the right place.

When you haven’t cooked in a while or you’re new to cooking, sometimes just one simple, delicious recipe can get you in the game. You start to cook that, maybe a few times within a couple of weeks, and then you find a more adventurous recipe. The effect keeps snowballing, and before you know, you’re regularly cooking a few times a week and have an array of recipes in your arsenal.

Fajitas were that door-opening recipe for me. They were one of the first things that I learned how to cook when I was beginning to fend for myself in the kitchen, and they still make an appearance in my regular dinner rotation. They’re delicious, they make great left-overs, plus they look fairly impressive if you’re having people over. Just look at those colors!

So today you’re going to learn the basics of this classic, go-to recipe for entertaining friends on movie night, game night, or whatever it is you crazy kids do for fun.

Enough chatter.

Let’s get to it!

Prep time: 15 minutes
Cook time: 15 minutes
Serves: 4-6

Ingredients:

• 1lb steak – flank or skirt steak works best. If you’re not a fan of beef or you’re on a budget, chicken thighs or breasts work great here too!
• 2 bell peppers – your choice of color
• 1 medium sized onion – I like red, but you can choose your favorite
• 2 tbsp olive oil (split into 1tbsp portions – one for marinade and one for cooking)
• juice from 2 lemons (or 3 limes)
• 1 tsp red chili powder
• 1/2 tsp garlic powder
• 1/8 tsp salt
• 1/8 tsp pepper

To serve:

• butter lettuce (or tortillas if you’re not feelin’ paleo or you have non-paleo guests)
• pico de gallo
• salsa
• avocado/guacamole
• cheese or sour cream (optional)

Equipment:

• cutting board
• knife
• mixing bowl
• fork
• skillet
• tongs

Instructions:

1. Make your sauce – Mix 1 tbsp of your olive oil with your lemon juice, red chile powder, garlic powder, salt, and pepper in a decently sized mixing bowl (you’re gonna put the steak in there too).

2. Slice your steak against the grain -This is probably the MOST IMPORTANT tip in this whole recipe, so listen up! Slicing your steak against the grain will allow the steak to be more tender and tasty. If you slice your steak the wrong way, you’ll end up with long, stringy, chewy, and damn near inedible steak bits. You can still eat the steak, but your jaw will get a hell of a workout, and you’ll be sad.

“I thought there were no grains in Paleo! What do you mean slice against the grain?!”

Take a look at that handsome hunk of beef on your cutting board. You’ll notice that there are a bunch of lines in the meat that are all facing the same direction. This is what is called the “grain”. You’re going to want to slice your meat perpendicular to those lines in the steak. Here’s what that’ll look like:

In addition to slicing the meat against the grain, you’ll also want to slice it pretty thin. This is because we’re cooking this particular meat in a pan. If you slice it thin, you’ll be able to easily see when it’s cooked through, and the meat cooks quickly if it’s cut thin. You’re hungry. I’m hungry. Let’s hurry up and eat already.

I’m not going to get sciencey on you. I’m here to cook. If you want a nerdy, in-depth exploration of meat slicing theory, check out this post from the wonderful Alton Brown.

3. Put those steak slices in the sauce and mix it well to coat. Go ahead and mix it with your hands. Don’t be shy. Just make sure you wash your hands after.

Cover with plastic wrap or a plate or nothing at all and place your bowl of meat in your fridge – if you’re good at thinking ahead and marinading your meat ahead of time, you can leave this marinading for up to 4 hours. If you’re a last minute meal planner like myself, just keep the meat in the marinade while you’re prepping your other ingredients. This is long enough to help tenderize the meat and give it some flavor.

Don’t let recipes that require marinating deter you! Even 15-30 minutes is better than nothing.

4. Wash your knife and cutting board very well or switch them out. This is important! Nobody wants to make themselves sick with cross contamination. Some people even suggest keeping separate cutting boards for veggies and meats. Not a totally crazy idea since you’ll be 100% sure you’re not getting raw meat goo on your veggies!

5. Slice your onions and peppers. Do it like this:

Peppers:

Onion:

Note: I chose my onion poorly. It was a flat tire/donut shape instead of a round/sphere shape. There wasn’t much for me to hold on to while cutting, which means my fingers and the knife were hanging out pretty close together as I was slicing. Choose a more spherical onion when you’re shopping for this recipe. You’ll have less of a chance of chopping your fingies. (It happens to the best of us – careful with that link if you’re squeamish.)

5. Heat up your skillet.

6. Once it’s hot, toss your veggies on the stove with 1tbsp olive oil. Cook 3-4 minutes until they’re a little bit soft and shiny. Remove from heat and set aside.

7. Let your skillet heat up again, and then toss your meat in. Now, don’t just dump the whole bowl of meat in the skillet. I did this and I ended up having to drain it – not hard, but always makes me go “uuuuugh”. Learn from my mistakes! Use your tongs to place it in there nicely. You’re not going to want to put that extra marinade in the pan or else your meat will sort of boil and take longer to cook.

Cook that for 5-10 minutes or until steak is cooked thoroughly. How do you know it’s cooked? It’ll change color from red/pink to brown.

8. Toss the veggies back in the pan and mix them up with the meat. (I probably should have used a bigger pan).

9. Serve on tortillas or butter lettuce cups with pico de gallo, salsa, guacamole, or whatever else your heart desires.

Ta da!

Crushin’ it!

You made some damn tasty fajitas that look beautiful! Pat yourself on the back. Take a bow. You rock!

If you want your fajitas spicier, try adding red pepper flake or a dash of cayenne pepper into the marinade. Or you can pour on the hot sauce as a topping when you’re assembling.

If you’re a vegetarian, eliminate the meat and use portobello mushrooms or tempeh.

Need more calories or a side dish? Serve with some beans and rice. Or try a Mexican cauliflower rice.

Now I know some of you seasoned cooks might be offended by the fact that I cooked this recipe in a pan. It is summer-time in the northern hemisphere and that’s prime grillin’ season.

But this recipe is intended for all you level 1 folks out there. (Yes, you.) It only takes about 30 minutes and uses a new cook’s most basic skill set (cutting and cooking stuff in a pan). If you want to grill your fajita meat and veggies, be my guest! I know it’s delicious, but unfortunately not all of us have access to a grill. Plus, for beginner chefs: the possibility of under or over cooking increases significantly when cooking over an open flame.

Veterans of the kitchen, what tips did I miss to make this meal tastier for newbies?

• Do you have a secret fajita sauce recipe?
• Do you add an unconventional vegetable to your line-up that’s out of this world?
• Do you use shrimp instead of beef or chicken?

Do you do something different with fajitas, or just have a question about the recipe? See you in the comments!

-Noel

source https://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2016/07/21/simple-and-delicious-how-to-cook-fajitas/

Get Fit with Pokemon GO!

So what exactly is this hype to catch ’em all?

I don’t know about you, but walking to work, around my neighborhood, or running errands doesn’t elicit much excitement. But Pokémon Go has turned walking around our communities into a half scavenger hunt, half RPG game that is incredibly engaging.

In less than a week, Pokémon Go has become the number one mobile game with over 7 million downloads (you can download it for your Iphone or Droid).

Players use their phones to hunt and search for digital creatures (Pokémon). The rub is that you actually have to physically get out and walk around to find these creatures. Think of it like virtual birdwatching, and you’re halfway there. Whereas most video games leave us inside and sedentary, Pokémon Go integrates a physical and social dynamic.

Just trying to find all the different Pokémon in the game will take you quite some time (there are 151), and players are rewarded for exploring new areas of their town or city, as different Pokémon appear in different locations.

It’s this sense of exploration and wonder that has caught (pun intended) a lot of people’s interest.

Don’t scoff at this game because you think it’s for kids. We could all use a little more child-like fun, activity, and imagination in our lives.

Exercise can actually be enjoyable and automatic, fueled by fun instead of that nagging feeling in our heads.

Pokémon Go shows us how.

Pokemon Go: How can it help me get healthy?

Remember: you’re rewarded as you explore new locations: you find new Pokémon and Poké Stops (essentially, an ever-refilling treasure chest full of loot). Yes, that grocery store on the corner or the community center down the street? These aren’t just buildings: They’re refueling stops with sick l00t on the quest to catch em all.

More than that, you hatch eggs you can pick up at Poké Stops into Pokémon by… wait for it… walking! The more walking required to hatch the egg, the rarer the Pokémon.

And walking is one of the best things we can do for ourselves: it’s been shown in countless studies that extra walking (5,000 – 10,000 steps/day) can improve mood and body composition, as well as lower anxiety. Why not use Pokémon Go as the impetus to add in those extra steps?

For some, the game itself will be motivation enough to get out and about. But how can you use the game to level up your day outside even further?

Pack a healthy lunch and walk to a park. A new park that’s farther away? Even better! (Rarer Pokémon!)

Try walking around the mall, instead of shopping online. (Hint: Malls tend to be loaded with Pokémon)

Take that dog of yours for a longer walk. Your dog wins AND your Pokémon army wins.

If you walk a lot in your town/city, take a longer route to work/gym. Or park further away and walk extra steps to hatch yourself a new pokémon!

FINALLY exercise on your lunch break: a walk during your lunch break. Or take that walk after dinner.

Or explore a historical landmarks (Poké Stops correspond with statues, monuments, and points of interest.)

Warning: Don’t use Pokémon Go as an excuse to walk to get ice cream. Reward yourself with things that reward you back (like new running/walking shoes). We want to be careful not to integrate the game into our existing habits, but to use it as a means to build a healthier life.

Walking now, work out later. What might that look like?

The Pokemon Go Workout!

Spend some time walking and hatching eggs, and when you’re ready to take things up a notch, try the  Pokémon Go Workout!

Are you ready?

Do the number of reps of the exercises (below) equal to your trainer level. As you level up and your trainer level increases, you’ll need to do more and more reps of each exercise.

But what are you doing reps of?

• Catch a Pokémon that flies? Or could fly? Do jumping jacks like a creature flapping its wings (okay, you can do normal jumping jacks)
• Catch a Pokémon that doesn’t fly? Do squats or burpees, a classic ground-based exercise.
• Catch a Pokémon that looks like a bug? Do lunges like a bug moving its legs.

Bonus exercises:

• If you catch a Pokémon around anything that you could safely do a chin-up from (playground equipment, most likely), then do chin-ups or jumping chin-ups!
• Still can’t get enough? Every time a Pokémon runs away, sprint to the corner (or another close, nearby landmark).
• Egg just hatch? Sit at the bottom of a squat for 30 seconds or more (like you’re hatching an egg!).

I Pika-choose you

Now what if you find yourself saying, “I don’t have kids to take around or friends who are interested in this stuff, what do I do?” We all know that workout buddies can add accountability to any exercise routine. And we also know A LOT of people are playing this now.

I was at a concert this week and the employee at Will Call had his phone lying on the table with Pokémon Go running. A natural conversation started on what Pokémon were running around the area, and he clued me in as to where nearby Poké Stops were. A game that gets you moving around and helps to overcome some social anxiety? Awesome. Here are some other great stories from the Rebellion:

Don’t want to brave out into the wilderness to meet people without a fan? Check out the Nerd Fitness Pokémon Go group. Also, there are a TON of local Pokémon Go groups popping up on Facebook, Meetup, and other social media hubs. Check them out!

PokeHacks: Master Pokemon Go

 

With Pokémon Go being a brand new game, we’ve assembled some pro-tips to arm you with the knowledge you need to become a master trainer in no time.

If you’re totally new, be sure to open up your game menu and in the upper right click on “tips”. It will give you a quick tutorial on important game elements!

Here are our starter tips and tricks. (We’ve also put together a more complete Pokemon Go page to act as a community glossary/wiki of all things Pokemon Go. Have something that should be added? Let us know in the comments!)

Tracking Pokémon: Use the radar in the lower right to find Pokemon in the area. Keep the radar open and if the Pokemon you’re tracking moves to the left or up on the grid, that means you’re getting closer!

Finding Pokemon hot spots: Pokemon tend to congregate around high traffic areas (malls, bus stops, restaurants) as well as points of interests (statues, parks).

Throwing Technique, Bonuses, and Power Ups: For less immersiveness but a slight in-game advantage, turn off your AR (switch in upper right corner) when throwing Pokeballs. It helps center the Pokemon on your screen better. Some gamers also find that throwing a Pokeball with their index finger instead of their thumb to be more accurate.

Curveball bonus: We’ve tried a lot of these techniques and found a tenuous connection at best. At just an additional 10 XP, I wouldn’t worry about chasing after this bonus.

Nice, Great, and Excellent Throw Bonus: At an extra 10, 50, and 100 XP bonus respectively, these are the ones to go after! Hold the Pokeball and watch for a shrinking colored circle. Hit that circle with your Pokeball! The smaller the circle, the bigger the bonus!

Power Ups: If your Pokemon keep escaping, use razz berries or more powerful Pokeballs. Both become available when your character reaches higher levels.

Transfer Pokémon back to the Professor: Have a lot of repeat Pokemon? “Transfer” them back to get an item called candy, which you can use to power up or evolve the stronger pokemon.

Powering Up vs. Evolving. What should I do? Generally, you’ll want to evolve your Pokémon first, as they get an enormous, permanent boost in strength. After you evolve them, you can decide if you want to power them up further.

Looking to level up FAST? A lucky egg doubles your experience bonus from all actions for 30 minutes. You can make the most of that valuable 30 minutes by combining the following actions:

Save up all your candies for a few days beforehand. Make sure you transfer the weaker pokemon in for candies, but save enough that you can evolve them. (If you have 36 pidgey candies, keep your 3 highest pidgeys to evolve).
Park yourself at a PokeStop and drop a lure on it (lasts 30 minutes). Or you can find one someone else has used (they’ll be purple).
Pop one of your incense (lasts 30 minutes)
Pop your lucky egg (lasts 30 minutes)
Start using all those saved candies to evolve your pokemon. You’ll double your EXP bonus to +2000 for a pokemon you didn’t have before and to +1000 for one you already had.

Your catch bonus will also be doubled, and you should be reeling ‘em in quickly thanks to the lure and incense. Now spend the next 30 minutes catching swarms of pokemon and frantically evolving everything you can. You can easily jump up 2-3 levels and become the very best that no one ever was.

Should I buy anything from the store? We think incubators are your best bet: the more incubators you have, the more benefit you get when you walk around. Fun incentives to get moving? Win!

Time of day makes a difference: Did you know that some different Pokémon can come out at night! Stay safe though!

Saving your battery: Turn on the battery saver function in the game’s settings menu! The phone dims when turned upside-down. For those of you who aren’t messing around, consider a portable charger!

Game frozen? Let it go.When in doubt, force stop the game and restart it.

Gyms and Battles: There is no inherent advantage to any team color, pick whichever one you want. When training or battling at a gym, pick your Pokemon based on the other Pokemons weaknesses. Refer to this handy chart.

All who wander are . . . probably playing Pokemon Go

Maybe you’re ready to jump into the craze that is Pokémon Go. Even if you’re not, I hope we rekindled some sense of curiosity and imagination in you… that exercise doesn’t have to be a chore, but it can be a pleasant side effect of just getting out and having fun.

We certainly hope to see more of this with video games in the future. Wouldn’t you rather get outside and play a game, instead of staying inside and pounding away on a treadmill? And sure, Pokémon Go might not replace your current workout regimen anytime soon, but it can be an excellent (and fun!) addition. Getting in more steps everyday is always recommended for improved physical health, and keeping a sense of kid-like wonder is sure to improve your mental health too.

Do you have any tips that we can add to our page on Pokémon Go? Let us know in the comments!

Happy Hunting!

-Jim

P.S. From Steve: I’m in the UK and doing last minute NF Rebel meet ups in Scotland and London THIS WEDNESDAY AND THURSDAY. Sign up on Facebook for Scotland and London and get the details as they get finalized. Hope to see you there!

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source https://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2016/07/18/get-fit-with-pokemon-go/

The Deadpool Guide to Self-Love

This is a guest post from Camp Nerd Fitness Headmaster Amy Clover SPOILER ALERT: If you haven’t seen Deadpool, for the love of gawd go watch it already, then get your ass back here. 

We can all resonate with Deadpool at least a little bit.

For whatever reasons, we run around hiding our faces because we’re convinced — if someone sees who we really are — they’ll run in the other direction.

My whole life, I’ve hidden who I am because I thought I was “supposed” to be different: changing my body, my interests, the way I talked, the way my brain worked, who I was, in order to be worthy.

After every breakup, I’d run to the gym to cardio myself to death because *obviously* it was my body’s fault he didn’t stick around. I realize now how incredibly effed that is. I just thought that was what I needed to do to be liked and loved.

Note from Steve: For some, this can manifest itself in the belief that being bigger and stronger or more ripped will solve all of our confidence/happiness problems. In short, it’s the feeling of being “forever small.”

The idea that we need to be a certain way in order to be validated is a story we tell ourselves. One that gets us nowhere and nothing. Mine was about my body, but maybe yours has to do with needing to be seen as the “funny friend” or “smart one” – maybe you feel the need to achieve certain milestones to establish your worth (wealth, the status of a certain job, or the respect that comes along with having a family or partner).

Without validation from others, I was worthless. It was only when someone else loved me that I thought I was worth anything at all. And I was always surprised when I couldn’t keep my mask on all the time (doing and being all those things that weren’t really me).

Just like Deadpool, we’ve gotta make peace with who’s under that mask.

My wish is that you get to the end of this post confident in your next steps to finally taste the Daffodil Daydream of your own being… that came out wrong… or did it?
Ready to turn your horror movie into a love story? Here’s the Deadpool guide to loving yourself. Not literally, though.

Step 1: Investigate “You”

You’ve probably heard the term “authentic self.” While it may make you want to gag from even uttering such a mouthful of new age woo-dom, it’s something most of us should pay more attention to.

When Wade Wilson wakes up deformed after all the tests Ajax has done on him, he’s crushed. Though he had no control over what happened to him, he determines he’s no longer lovable because of how he turns out. His self-worth is instantly reduced to zero.

Deadpool’s experience is just like any trauma that’s happened to us, be it bullying, abuse, ultra-painful rejection or simply living a life to meet the expectations of others. Instead of seeing and accepting the way we really are, we react with fear, anger, or a sense of defeat.

These experiences shape the beliefs we have about ourselves, some of the most common being that we have to look a certain way to be worthy, we’re not enough, we’re a burden, we have nothing important to say, we’re worthless, and a whole bunch of other horrible things we’d never ever say to anyone else. We start to believe we have to know the perfect thing to say and do in every situation, instead of just being ourselves. Are you you? Or the “you” you think the world wants?

Maybe you were made fun of for being skinny, so now you feel you have to be buff to be worthy of positive attention, or you lost someone way before their time and now you’re afraid everyone will leave you without warning, so you cling to people. Maybe something horrible happened to you, and now you’re constantly on the lookout for danger, anticipating it in situations where there isn’t a threat (which can keep you from true intimacy). These beliefs are strong; they feel like the truth. But they’re not.

Here’s the truth: These experiences happen to us, but they are not who we are.

The real you – the person you are right here and right now – is pure f***ing worth. Every single person on this earth, exactly as they are, no matter how “deformed,” is worthy of happiness.
While it’s easy to read that and understand it logically, it’s a whole other beast to start believing it.

Make peace with your “Deformities”

The first step to embracing your “deformities” – the stuff you think needs changing – is to truly face what they are. You have a few options; pick your poison:

1) Write it out

If you’ve ever gone to Strong Inside Out, you’ll know I’m a biiiiiiig fan of journaling. It’s helped me work through my own “deformities.” Here’s how to start:

1. Open a Google Doc.
2. Write down whatever’s bothering you for 5 minutes.

Not the most intricate of tools, but incredibly helpful for processing what happened, how you feel, and tearing apart the beliefs fear has instilled in you. You never have to share your notes with another soul if you don’t want to.

Those of us who are really proud might not be able to bring ourselves to write down the things that bother us. It’s easier to throw our hands up and say “this is all nonsense” than admit we don’t feel like we’re enough.

When we refuse to face things that bring us pain, we give them more power. The terror increases because we’re sure if we look at it, it will destroy us.

I’ve got some news for you, friend: you are not some fragile little flower. You are ALIVE, and here to level up your life.

Heroes don’t shy away from their problems, they face them. You can’t deal with what you refuse to face. Seeing your fears and beliefs out on paper makes them less ambiguous and can help you see them for what they really are; it helps to take away some of their power over you.

You need to get it out so you can look it in the eyes like the badass you are. This is the only way to deal with the issue in the long run – turning to a diet or whatever other fear-based shortcut you come up with (getting a pump before you go out), just won’t work in the long run.

2) Looks don’t define your self-worth

…no matter what David Beckham sounds like when he talks, or how Ryan Reynolds got so far in the acting world.

A lot of us hide who we really are because we think we’re supposed to look different. We feel shame about not looking like the 5% of people depicted as beautiful in the media, and society ain’t helping.

You’ll read a lot of propaganda on the interwebs about why you should look different than you do (often so they can make money) and how to do it by totally wrecking your health (Steve recently wrote about this). When you aim for physical goals aligned with love for who you truly are and the healthiest version of you — rather than needing to look different to be worthy — it can be a truly positive experience. When it’s based in needing to be good enough, however, it almost always leads to disastrous ends.

Whether you’re looking to achieve big physical changes, or going after some status in your career, you cannot shame yourself into positive changes. The energy doesn’t add up. You’ve gotta embrace what you’ve got, even if you plan to change it (in a healthy way).

To do this, explore the real reason you think you need to change. In the case of your body – explore your “need to look perfect”:

Is it because you think perfect people have their shit together? They don’t. That’s their own particular mask to fool the world.

Is it because you think your problems will disappear when you become “perfect?” First of all, there is no “perfect.” Second of all, they might… and new troubles will come in to take their place.

Is it because you’ve always been taught you need to look that way to be attractive? That this is how you achieve acceptance and status?

A great exercise to break through this mindset is to actively focus for one full day on finding beauty in real people around you. Not just superficial beauty, but real, heart-expanding beauty inside and out.

Ugh I just set off my own gag reflex. What I mean to say is go out and find something that gives your heart a hard on… or heart on???

Jot down what you find throughout the day. I bet you’ll be surprised just how many forms beauty can take.

Remember what Vanessa said, “It’s just a face” (or a body). Your worth runs so much deeper.

3. Stop one-upping your pain

When I was really struggling, I knew no one had it as bad as me. I held all the pain inside, refusing to talk about it because I knew no one would understand. Whenever anyone said they had it hard, I always had my own version of “ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn” to argue back with.

Whatever we focus on becomes our reality. I fought for my own pain, which made me live in it every single day. What I didn’t realize was that just like Deadpool, I could fight for something else. When I chose to fight for healing instead, my reality shifted.

There’s a certain sick satisfaction we get by thinking we’re alone and in more pain than those around us. It feeds our egos and fears, giving us a sense of “terminal uniqueness”; we think we’re so different that we’re beyond help and incapable of change.

While I believe you are indeed a complex, distinct snowflake-of-a-being, you are never so broken that you’re beyond help and change. To tell yourself that is to give up on any purposeful happiness you might create.

Talk It Out

The reason we hide from who we really are is that we are ashamed of it. Our old (false) beliefs are so strong, they’ve made our truth revolting to us.

Every single superhero-in-training (X-Men especially) deals with this. It’s the natural outcome of our society. Maybe you’re scared you’ll never have the job you want. Maybe something happened in the past you’ve never fully processed, or maybe you just don’t know how to talk about the thoughts that go through your head that you think you’re ‘not supposed’ to think.

Talking to someone who’s got your best interests in mind is probably the most healing thing you could ever do. If you read my last post here, you know how big a fan of therapy I am. While I know that’s not the most welcome option for everyone, it’s been the single most helpful aspect of my personal recovery (and many others’ whom I’ve helped along the way).

That said, if it’s not your thing, there are other options with less stigma attached to them. For instance, online chat platforms are available for free or for very little and they can be a great way to get comfortable with talking about your stuff before you talk about it with someone in person. You can talk with trained listeners or real therapists online 24/7. A few examples are 7 Cups, Talkspace or BlahTherapy. Please keep in mind that non-therapist listeners won’t always have the answers you crave, but their hearts are usually in the right place.

Still iffy about therapy even if it’s online? Find your Weasel.

Weasel is the only person Deadpool really opens up to because he’s a good listener and he’s got his back no matter what. Usually, you’ll know when you’ve found your Weasel, but if you’re still on the lookout, here’s the ad to post in your brain’s classifieds:

• Is a good listener: Doesn’t constantly interrupt, tell you you’re wrong or judge you, actually hears what you’re saying (instead of “Uh-huh”-ing you to death).
• Can put ego aside: Lots of us are fixers, but sometimes we just need to talk stuff out so we can better understand it. You should feel comfortable saying, “Do you mind just listening to me for a few minutes? I need to talk through this,” and know this person will.
• Keeps things private: Trust this person enough to keep things between you quiet.
• Wants the best for you: When Ajax came into the bar and snagged the pic of Vanessa, Weasel told Wade right away. You want someone who’s going to look out for you, even if that means they lovingly call you out when nasty stuff like fear is threatening to ransack your life.

When Colossus and Negasonic Teenage Warhead come to your aid, let them help. I know it’s scary, trust me. But the benefits far outweigh the risks.

Four or Five Moments

Let’s just put this out there: change is HARD. If it was easy, you’d be all sunshine and rainbows by now.

The recommendations I’m making here require you to get down and dirty with stuff you may not have looked at in a long time. Scary stuff. Here’s where I’m going to defer to Colossus…

Four or five moments is all it takes to become the hero of your own life.

Those moments might be extremely uncomfortable at first, but you have to stay with them — to sit with whatever demands to be felt — in order to move past them for good.
Most people don’t push through these moments. They avoid them, looking for quick-fix solutions that are more comfortable than dealing with the real stuff. And to their surprise, they always land back in this state of defeat. This is why they feel like they’re incapable of change. We need to focus on the real, root cause:

Diet plans focus on the symptom of overeating, but not on the reasons why we use food to escape life.

Some personal development rhetoric focuses on positive affirmations that completely contradict what you feel about yourself, ringing untrue and actually working you deeper into dark thoughts.

When we try to change our lives with these methods, we come to believe we are failures because they don’t work. But it’s the programs that fail us.

We have to deal with what’s real; we have to commit to the suckage of it until it stops sucking so hard.

Let me lay some truth down on you: You can handle anything that comes your way. Anything. You just won’t know that’s the truth until you have those four or five moments and come out the other side. You may be a different person after; we all know Deadpool came out the other side looking like a totally different hero. And that’s the point.

Give it your maximum effort and you will come out the other side.

Take off the mask, make peace with what you’ve been labeling “deformities,” and find an ally along the way to help you see your own false narrative.

If you’re taking the plunge, comment with “MAXIMUM EFFORT!!!” below this post so I can send you spirit fingers vibes from afar!

-Amy

Amy Clover is a fitness personality, speaker and the force behind Strong Inside Out, a site that helps people “become stronger than their struggle” through fitness and positive action. She’s also one of our beloved Headmasters, a yellow belt in Taekwondo and was president of anime club in high school. Nerd alert!

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photo: Deadpool images: wikimedia, Gif: Wikimedia, Sideways Deadpool: wikimedia, coffee

source https://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2016/07/14/the-deadpool-guide-to-self-love/

Does Limu Juice Work?

Choose Your Own Adventure

Whether it’s getting in shape, finally quitting our job, making new friends, or trying that new class we’ve had our eye on, sometimes making the right choice puts us in an uncomfortable situation. Sometimes it puts us in uncomfortable situations over and over again.

Sometimes this takes the form of social pressure: so often we hear from those who are trying to get healthy are regularly pressured by friends to eat or drink a certain way because they “earned it” or because they should “live a little.”

And it’s not just social pressure: starting an exercise habit isn’t easy. Stepping into the gym for the first time can be incredibly intimidating. Being new and returning day after day takes some grit. Sometimes we need 20 seconds of courage to make the leap. Sometimes we need a bigger push out the door.

For hundreds of people, that’s Camp Nerd Fitness.

As most of you know, Camp Nerd Fitness takes place this September in the mountains of North Georgia. We’re bringing together hundreds of the Rebellion’s finest (that’s you) along with 17 of our most trusted and inspiring instructors (affectionately known as Headmasters), to spend a couple of days together learning crazy new skills like sword fighting, parkour, and weight lifting. From mental health to meal prep to confidence and everything in between, this is a dedicated space to level up.

We are down to the wire: sales will end July 22, or until our last 25 tickets are spoken for. Camp is a week out of the year where you are allowed and encouraged to choose yourself first. In normal life, that choice isn’t so easy, but at Camp, you create your own path to level up in a way that energizes and motivates you, and unbuttons the potential buried inside all of us.

Regular life tells us that jobs and spouses and kids and dozens of other things are more important than choosing yourself. Today we want to prove that when you’re in charge of your own destiny, great adventure and growth awaits.

The choices are yours and yours alone. Are you ready?

Choose Your Path

*thud*

You trip to the ground after catching your foot on a tangled root. On your hands and knees, you shake your head, disoriented, and look around.

“Where am I?” you think, “I was in the middle of reading one of Steve’s articles…and now I’m in the…forest? What happened?”

Beside you on the ground you see a small velvet pouch with a note tied to it.

“I was charged with protecting this with my life. If you’re reading this, I failed. Its owner must be found.”

Peering down the pouch, you notice a small amulet tucked inside. You are overwhelmed with a sense of peace, excitement and power. You gaze deeper into the purple stone wanting to learn more when you hear a rustling in the tall grass. Something has noticed you.

You turn to run, but the creature is already behind you. The amulet is ripped from your hands as the creature darts off towards the hills.

You start to chase after him, but the little monster is too quick. You grow tired and slow down, watching him disappear into the forest.

Initially you think about giving up – deep down you KNEW you shouldn’t have opened your email today. But something in the back of your mind nudges you to keep trying, and you head toward the hill – beginning your journey to recover the stolen amulet.

As you climb the hill, you see a group of people LARPing among the trees. Their costumes are beautiful! “Wow, this is the most realistic LARP I’ve ever…” a broadsword cleaves a man in a ninja costume in half “…whoa.”

A knight whizzes by on his horse, his mare rearing up at you knocking you flat on the ground. Startled, you stand up, and back into a tree.

“What is your business here?” he demands.

“I…I’m searching for a stolen amulet…a little gobliny creature stole it and ran off this way” you stutter.

“Help end this fray and I shall aide you in your noble quest! You may fight under the guidance of Headmaster Dakao, Master of Swords, or with Headmasters Rachael and Rog, Masters of hand to hand martial arts. Both Knights and Ninjas have an even claim to the land, but you may tip the balance of the battle.”

You think to yourself ‘this is insane!’ but you know that to move forward, you’ll have to choose one. You’ve always dreamed of mastering skills you’ve loved in RPGs, novels, and the history of real fighters; this could be the moment you start to live out those dreams!

“So,” the knight says, “who will it be?”

Choice #1
Traveller, choose your path:

Dakao hands you a broadsword and a shield, “The sword is an extension of you – respect it, don’t be afraid of it, and value it as you would your own hand. Sound good?” You nod, trying to internalize the tips he’s just given you. “Ready?” He looks at you expectantly. You nod in spite of your stomach tying itself up in knots. “Let’s do this!”

Dakao turns and faces the onslaught of opponents, and to your own surprise, you find yourself in the thick of it by his side, fending off blows and sending the enemy reeling backward in fear. After several minutes that feel like hours, the number of attackers dwindles and you realize: YOU’RE WINNING!

Rachael sends a knight in heavy armor flying with a kick to the chest, while Rog chokes out an attacker whose helmet has fallen off in the fighting.

Rachael calls out to you “Joining us?” You nod, hesitantly.

“Awesome!” Rog calls out.

Rachael shouts to you “It’s ok to be scared, use that energy for speed and power!”

“Their armor makes them slow and heavy, and it’s hard for them to see you coming.” says Rog as Rachael kicks an opponent to him and he wrestles the clanking foe to the ground.

There you are in the thick of it – punching, kicking and fighting tooth and nail when all of the sudden you notice something strange… YOU’RE WINNING!

As the last of the defeated foes surrender, and your mentor gives you a nod of respect, “Well fought, and well won. Rarely have I seen such valor, and from one so…” looking at your clothes “…unusual in these parts.”

“The creature you seek is likely one of the thieving goblins – they steal whatever they can lay their hands on, but what they love best is stealing power and magic for their own dark purposes. Their horde is in the goblin burrow beyond the woods – you’ll reach them sooner if you take Paleon here.” He hands you the reigns to his horse, you thank your mentor and head off in the direction of the mountains.

Paleon carries you to the edge of the wooded mountains, but rounding a corner you meet a massive boulder blocking your path.

“Hey! That horse any good at climbing over boulders?” calls out a man hanging from a nearby tree branch.

“Maybe she could help us push it out of the way!” replies a fellow walking on his hands. The small crowd laughs cheerily.

A woman steps forward. “What do you think, Kate G.? Kate M.? This rider must be a great hero to have earned the respect of a horse like Paleon.”

The last two women chuckle at your expression “Yes, we’re the Kates. You’ll get used to it.”

“Oh, but I’m no hero I just…” you trail off, more concerned about the 900 pound boulder in the room. “How can I get past this? I need to get to the other side to hunt down a goblin thief.”

“We’ll tend to the horse, but you’ll have to choose – you can either apply your strength to move it with Jim, Jen and Amy, or you can use flexibility, mobility, and primal movements to climb over it with Jonathan and the Kates.”

Both options seem impossible at first, but you must choose….

Choice #2
Traveller, choose your path:

Jim and Jen stand to one side of you, Amy on the other, and test out the weight of the rock a few times by pressing on it. The three of them settle into an athletic stance and brace themselves against the rock. They begin to push, but it only moves an inch. You mimic their stance and movements, bracing yourself against the rock… and it moves another inch.

“Keep your form strong and engage your legs!” calls out Jim.

A few shoves later and the boulder tips against the edge of the trail and topples thunderously down the rest of the mountain. After high fives with everyone involved, a sweaty group hug, and a team exclamation of “I’M A HERO!” you’re ready to continue your journey.

You watch as Kate G., Kate M., and Jonathan survey the surface of the boulder, looking for ridges and holes that could become toe and finger holds.

“Here, start with these larger outcroppings and you’ll get the hang of it.” Kate G. advises.

Starting with the more sizeable holds, you try your best to copy the way your three Headmasters move carefully up the side of the boulder – and before you know it, you’re at the top, ready to make your descent! After fistbumps and congratulations, you’re ready to continue your journey.

The ordeal of the boulder behind you, you draw a deep breath and accept a drink of water from one of your new companions. “Well done! If you want to get to the goblin burrows before dark you’ll need to hurry. Though I’m sure a hero like you isn’t afraid of the dark.”

“I’m no hero… I just want to get that amulet back.” You take another quick swallow and thank your new friends for the drink.

“I think you’ll be surprised to find this is how most heroes begin… but you won’t have to take my word for it.” You smile and make your goodbyes before heading back to the trail.

“Oh! Do take care crossing the bridge though, that troll has been grouchy for the last fortnight and a half and doesn’t take kindly to passersby!”

Great. Now you’ll have to face a troll. Things seem to getting harder and harder…

As the trees clear you see a bridge in the distance, and a miserable mud hovel to your right. A purple-grey face bursts out of the hovel and shouts at you “Who’s that trip trapping over… the road? I am Droll the Troll, be off with you!”

“I’m sorry.. I just need to cross the river.”

“Oh, never heard THAT one. Why not ‘Get back, I’ll curse you’? Why not hurl stones? You know the only thing worse than being a troll?”

You shrug, unsure of how to respond to a sassy rhetorical troll.

“NOTHING! No one talks to you or smiles. No dancing or joke telling or story sharing.”

In the woods behind you, you hear laughter and music, and you swear you see longing in the troll’s face.

“Nothing’s worse than being a troll.”

Behind you the noisy travellers stop short seeing the troll. You have moments to choose what to do, and surprise yourself by speaking up.

“Uh… hello there, travellers!” You shout, scrambling for something to say.

“Would you… uh…honor Droll the Troll with your performance?”

Choice #3
Traveller, choose your path:

Barb, the traveller who’d been getting the most laughs out of the crowd, takes you by the hand and guides you over to stand in front of Droll, a few paces across the road.

“With improv the best strategy is to relax and say ‘yes, and’ to just about everything the scene suggests. This is gonna be fun!” She gives you a big smile and stands across from you on the ‘stage’ in front of the troll.

You take a deep breath, and the scene begins, Barb masterfully leading the action, asking for suggestions from the audience, and helping you take the lead as a performer! Droll laughs and slaps her knee at your performance, you’ve done it! You’ve made the troll laugh!

Stephanie and Shawn stand beside you and turn to you for strategy “It’s easiest to dance if you have a little music to go with it – do you think you could clap a rhythm for us?” You agree and clap the rhythm just the way they showed you, and the dance begins.

Soon all the travellers are clapping or dancing, and soon Shawn and Stephanie reach out to you to welcome you into the ring! You remember to relax and partner with both of them, spinning in the road till Droll jumps up and begins clapping and dancing herself.

You’ve done it! You’ve even gotten the troll to dance!

“That was well planned, you’re quite the quick-thinking bard!” your Headmaster whispers to you, with the tiniest of bows.

Laughing, Droll begins to dance like a gleeful child before the entertainers. “May I join you in your travels? I haven’t been this happy since my bridge collapsed!”

“…Collapsed?”

Droll claps you on the back “But I’ve got a new hobby and a better mood to match. I’m thinking I’ll find a new bridge – somewhere they play music and laugh at my jokes!”

You can’t help but smile as Droll walks away with the travellers…

…until you remember the broken bridge.
In the middle where planks of wood ought to lie across the stone sides, there are a few moldy splinters of wood with nothing in between. You see two men skipping stones.

“Hey, you there!” They call out. “How would YOU cross this bridge?”

“That bridge is caved in… it can’t be crossed,” you reply, losing hope that you will ever see the amulet again.

“Well, maybe not in the typical way. But try looking at it as a puzzle to be solved!”

“We could vault from one side to the other, or swing along the sides.”

“With a single plank and a little planning we could cross quickly and easily!”

Looking from the bridge to the men, you begin to see it as a chance to do something amazing! You must choose: will you climb, swing, and jump? Or use your wits to plan, try and test?

Choice #4
Traveller, choose your path:

Robin, Master of Parkour, does a few stretches while he talks to you about how to move efficiently while scaling the bridge and surrounding nature.

“Parkour seems scary, but it’s really about trusting yourself and moving efficiently. We don’t have to do fancy moves to get across unless we want to. What seems efficient to you?”

He waits for you to respond, and you remember watching TV shows with obstacle courses like this one. “Well, If we could move straight across, that seems simplest…?”

“Sounds good, let’s get started!” You watch as Robin hangs from the rail of the bridge and swings his body back and forth like a pendulum, building up momentum to move his hands along the rail!

It seems impossible, but he coaches you through how to move your body and grip the rail until before you know it, you’re on the other side!

Peter takes a good long look at the bridge, and you join him in studying it.

“The trick is,” he says “to use whatever we have on hand to accomplish our goal. Our goal,” he says slowly, “is to get across… what do we have to work with?”

You look around and see two long boards off to the side of the road. “Well, there are two boards over there, but that’s not enough to mend the bridge.”

“Maybe not, but look at it differently. If we lay a board across the rails of the old bridge diagonally…” he waits for you to finish the thought, and at last, it occurs to you.

“…we’ll get a little closer to the other side each time we walk from rail to rail!”

You pick up the boards and do just that.”

You touch down on the other side of the bridge, delighted to have made it across, but even more excited about how you did it.

“Incredible,” you think to yourself in quiet amazement.

Both Headmasters make it across just behind you, Peter carefully placing the plank and stepping down, Robin swinging himself off the bridge and rolling as he hits the ground.

“Well done!” they say as they both congratulate you. “Best of luck on the road ahead, traveller.”

As you hike onwards, a house begins to grow on the horizon. It seems to be the last sign of anyone before the mountains begin. But as you get closer something seems off… It’s far larger than you could have imagined possible.

As you reach the house you begin to tiptoe past it on the road – you’ve had enough trouble for one day. Suddenly you hear a rumbling breath like thunder above, and an angry looking Giant emerges.

Three much smaller, normal sized souls who appear to be hiding wave you over, motioning you to be quiet.

The giant doesn’t seem to notice you and the others yet, but it’s only a matter of time if you wish to pass.

“We’ve got to find a way to distract this giant,” you plea, “any ideas?”

A man with a bow slung over one shoulder kicks a shard of pottery as he draws closer.

“Shh! He’ll hear you!” you instinctively whisper

“Ah… Yes!” he looks at his bow, “Excellent notion! The shelves here are full of pottery and this giant has the largest ears I’ve ever seen!”

“There’s no need for violence” one of the others snaps. “Why make such a mess when we can apply our wits to the problem. Maddie and I here are famed chefs in our towns, known for how distracting the scent of our cooking can be!”

Both plans make no sense at all, until you remember: all you have to do is distract the giant, not slay him! The scent of a delicious meal or the sound of crashing pottery would be excellent distractions! But which to choose…

Choice #5
Traveller, choose your path:

Maddie and Michelle guide you toward a corner of the giant’s fireplace and open up a shoulder bag full of small pouches and packages.

“The sad truth is, most people are under-seasoning their food when they cook at home.” Says Michelle, handing you a packet of magic mushroom powder.

“Aromatic spices and herbs make for delicious flavors, and mouth-watering smells,” adds Maddie. You’re surprised to see Maddie unwrap three steaks and a jar of seasonings, all while Michelle began using the fire to warm a cast iron skillet she wore on her hip like a sword.

“Here, you try seasoning them with these” You rub the steaks down with salt and pepper, and a strange red powder labelled “Ancho!” that Michelle handed you. The smell fills the room with a delicious scent that makes everyone hungry, especially the confused giant, who immediately begins banging around the cupboards to figure out what smells so good to eat!

Ned passes you his spare bow and a handful of arrows.

“With archery, you’ve got just one goal: the target. If you’re worried about too many other things, you’ll have a hard time making your shot.” He shows you how to check your bowstring, take aim, and then fires a shot at a mug on the shelf, which shatters immediately. You hear the giant shift and make a surprised noise. “Now you try!” Ned whispers.

You handle the bow and arrow just as he showed you, and take aim at a honey pot. You fire – and your target cracks apart leaking a sticky sweet mess! You both continue to shoot until the giant is swearing and confused, distracted enough for you to escape!

As the giant is distracted and stumbling around his home, the other adventurers make a break for it.

“Thank you so much, you’re a great one for strategy! You can get to the goblin burrows through the cellar, take care!”

You head for the cellar door, and finally you feel safe in the darkness… until you hear a click, and suddenly the floor flattens into a slide, hurling you into the darkness below where you land with a thud at the bottom.

You see an eerie green light up above, the silhouette of a dozen goblin heads peering at you from the lip of the pit you’ve fallen into

“WE HAVE A NEW VISITOR THEN?”

A loud, scraggly voice calls out. “MY GOBLINS, WHO INVITED OUR GUEST?”

One of the onlookers leaps up and you see him clearly – the very goblin who robbed you, your amulet gleaming in his grubby hand! “It was me, for stealing this amulet for ourselves, Master!”

You watch your amulet fall to the floor before the feet of a very regal, very filthy goblin twice the size of the others.

“Hail Golgor, The Great Goblin Underlord!” call out tiny voices all around you.

“YOU HAVE WASTED YOUR TIME, NONE RETRIEVE THEIR BOUNTY ONCE IT IS MINE.”

“Grovel for us, SILLY HUMAN!” a goblin voice cackles

“We’ll send you home quick as a wink… GIVE UP!” another chimes in.

“MISERABLE HUMAN! WEAKLING!” another shouts, until all the goblins are shrieking and laughing.”Your treasure is OURS!”

“HUMAN, YOU ARE BANISHED. LEAVE THIS PLACE AND NEVER RETURN. LEAVE US THE AMULET. YOU COULD NEVER HAVE COMPLETED THE QUEST. DID YOU REALLY THINK YOU COULD?!” The underlord laughs without joy, and all his minions follow suit.

Down in the pit you sit in the damp – truly alone for the first time in your journey, and beginning to despair – when the words of your companions come back to you.

“Rarely have I seen such valor… this is how most heroes begin… try looking at it as a puzzle… apply our wits to the problem…”

Your mind races. You start to put together a plan. It is crafty, daring, and bold. But then you realize: you could simply walk away and never think of this again.

Which would you choose? Letting the goblins send you back to a world that is safe and normal, or the chance to take a step into adventure and the unknown?

For many, finding a little peace and getting back to a life they’ve always known – with all it’s small troubles and small joys – would be the happiest ending.

But after fighting with brave warriors, making friends with a troll, and tricking a giant, is normal life all there is?

Will you return to the quiet, safe life you’ve always known or embark on a grand, glorious adventure?

The choice is yours…the amulet waits above you in the goblin’s horde, and a return to the comfortable world you know could be moments away.

But you can only choose one.

Which will it be?

Choice #6
Traveller, choose your path:

You now know what you’re really capable of, and you have the tools to act with intention.

A plan starts to formulate in your head. You have your wits, strength, agility, and a variety of special skills thanks to your Headmasters’ training. You decide on a course of action, and know exactly how you’ll get out of this.

You sense a power coming from that amulet, like it’s calling to you. You know you need to go back for it. Almost as if you can feel someone calling to you through it. Confident and determined, you step forward and begin: It’s the start of a new adventure, on your terms.

You take the offer and decide to walk away.

You’ll never know what was really behind that amulet. It felt as if it radiated power and goodness, like it came from some thing, or some one. Years later you can’t shake the nagging feeling like you’ve made a horrible choice, like you let someone down you never even met. Maybe it’s nothing. “What would have happened if I made a different choice…” haunts your thoughts. 

The Push Out the Door You Need

Whether you’re slaying treacherous creatures or your own fears and self doubt, you have a choice.

Sometimes a single choice can change your entire life.

It’s easy to feel like we’re stuck in a cycle. Our days too often leave us tired and unfulfilled, and it’s easy to distract ourselves from the problem instead of facing it head on.

In nearly every story, the hero needs a little “push” out the door. Hagrid comes to get Harry, Obi-wan introduces Luke to the wider universe , and Gandalf comes to kick off the Journey for both Bilbo and Frodo.

If you need a push out the door, there is no better push than Camp Nerd Fitness.

Camp is not only a single event that gives you the tools and knowledge you need to succeed year round, but it’s made up of an entire community who talks with each other every day to support, encourage, and celebrate victories. Plus, all the Headmasters that helped you along in your journey will be there to teach you the skills you chose in real life (yes, you may even learn tips about how to distract a giant).

It’s incredible to see people who have been stuck for years finally start to make a change, and implement it throughout the year backed by the support of fellow Campers online. It’s hard to describe the effect Camp has on those who haven’t been, but here are some Campers who gave it a try:

With sales closing on July 22 (or until we sell out our final 25 spots), your chance to be part of our most life changing week of the year is drawing to a close. 

So, what’ll it be?

Choice #7
Traveller, choose your path:

The world needs more heroes… will you heed the call?

-Steve

###

 

Fork, Forest Stairs, Hobbit Door, Moss Wall, Knight, Ninja, Bridge, Broken Bridge, Giant House, Archer

source https://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2016/07/10/choose-your-own-adventure/